March 14: A bag of crisping pins was found in the Library by University police. They will be placed in the University Furnace.
March 16: A woman was seen making her way to the Brimhall building. She was reported having wanton eyes and produced a fair amount of wincing. Police are investigating the matter.
March 18: Police [...]

Feb 7: A harpsichord was found with the seat not pushed in the Harris Fine Arts Center. Police are investigating the incident and the guilty party will spend a week in the underground dungeon.

Jan 9: A pair of knickers were found near the ZWKT by a student. The knickers were of brownish colour and the size befitting of a young pigsney. Policeman are investigating the incident.